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You Are Out Marcel, Out, Out, Out!


There are people who say TV is bad, but what can I say, I love the glowing box of warm life that keeps us company at night. I love to declare movie night, make popcorn, go to the Dad’s quick mart for Sour Skittles and M&Ms, pull the cushions off the couch and make a big TV-watching bed on the floor. On Demand allows me to watch the 10 p.m. shows at 5 a.m. instead, and doesn’t “On Demand” just make you sound so powerful, so I-want-what-I-want-when-I-want-it-so-give-it-to-me? One of Tolstoy’s rules to live by was to get up by 5 a.m., but I’m sure he meant get your writing done, not catch up on TV. At any rate Leo, if you were alive during this plethora of good, bad voyeuristic television, you might have been sucked in as well.

One of my new favorite shows is Snapped. It’s shameful to admit that when the Snapped marathon shows up on Oxygen, I watch it until I fall asleep, that soothing narrator voice creating dreams of exhumed ex husbands. I have even ordered Snapped On Demand. I have analyzed why I love it, and I’ve come up with this fact: I may have screwed some things up in my life, but I have never forced someone to drink antifreeze through a turkey baster, and for that I feel good. I won’t say proud, but … better than you, lady featured on Snapped, better than you. Yes, I nearly killed a guy when I knocked him off a ski lift from 8 feet up, yes, I stole $300 from the bank when I was 18 (the teller gave me 3 extra c notes and I cruised away quietly, happily, devoid of any morals but filled with ideas on how to spend my extra cash), yes, I have walked past many a homeless person and offered no spare change, even when I had change, yes I did, but I have not killed anyone. When you think your life is bad, you can watch Snapped and feel happy in the knowledge that you don’t have to wear prison orange and that you can go to the library whenever you want (well, except those two days when it is closed due to budget cuts).

My number one show, Top Chef, is making me very happy because finally, finally, Marcel has been ousted. No more foam! Yay! I loved it when Anthony Bourdain said, “Why foam? Why now?” with all that pain on his face. I saw all the comments on the Top Chef site, and I thought, These people need to get a life. And then I realized that I watch the show (usually I watch each episode twice), talk about it with friends, coworkers, and family, and now I am blogging about it, so in the race for loser I’m really not sure who is winning, but they seem to be beckoning me towards the stage to accept my award.

Because my mind is a million different places all the time, I’ll tell you, do you know what it is about the library? It’s warm. It’s love. It’s welcome all. It’s free. It’s come on in, spend as much time as you like. The Bootie Boy and I went to our favorite library yesterday, sat by the fireplace, got a snack from the vending machine, ate it while searching for books and movies (Starburst, think it was okay), found the Lady Gaga Biography and looked at that for a long time, then discussed the awesomeness of making a building shaped like an octagon before we realized we should go home and make dinner and do homework. Personally, I could have stayed there all night, or at least until the sweet library lady gently told me to hit the road. I do love it there.

My new finds:

Saving Cee Cee Honeycut by Beth Hoffman (so far it’s great, it will keep me from studying and sleeping I’m sure. Reminds me a bit of Fanny Flagg)
My Lives by Edmund White (can’t wait for this one)
An Ordinary Man by Paul Rusesabagina
The Making of a Chef : Mastering Heat at the Culinary Institute of America by Michael Ruhlma
Born to Run : a hidden tribe, superathletes, and the greatest race the world has never seen by Christopher McDougall

4 Comments leave one →
  1. 01/28/2011 2:14 am

    Add ‘Weird Sisters’ to your list, too–and yes, Ms M already knows about it. I, too, am happy that Marcel is gone–he is just too too. Love Carla, though!

  2. Sheri May permalink
    01/28/2011 7:24 pm

    LOL Steven always worries when I watch Snapped, he thinks I am looking for ideas!!! Maybe I am?

  3. 02/05/2011 4:23 pm

    No more FOAM, F* That foam…..bye bye Marcel….. ha ha ha

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